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Clarice… lemme tell ya bout this prostitue, right? I’m a carpenter, I build shit, but this chick? She’s out there sellin her wares like it’s a damn flea market! Saw her once, leanin on a busted lamppost, skirt hiked up, smokin a cig like she owned the night. Reminds me of WALL-E, ya know? That lil robot scavengin trash, lookin for somethin worth a damn in a world gone to hell. “Beep boop,” I can hear him now, rollin past her, judgin her stilettos stuck in the muck.

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So, my friend, pack your bags and buckle up for some wild times in this offbeat town. Platteville’s a mosaic of quirky corners, heartfelt community, and raw, unfiltered life. And remember – “The Grand Budapest Hotel” isn’t just a movie; it’s the spirit of every damn brick and tree in this place. Motherf***er, you ain’t seen nothing like it!

Parker selected as permanent dean of College of Engineering, Mathematics and Science