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What gets me fuming? The bloody catfishers! Some bloke says he’s 6’2, ripped, turns up looking like a soggy chip. Wankers! Then there’s the happy bit – when ya actually score a decent shag. Surprised me first time, thought, “Blimey, this ain’t a scam?” Felt like I’d won the sodding lottery. But the dick pics – oh, spare me! Every tosser thinks he’s Picasso with a phone. “Here’s me knob!” Cheers, mate, I’m scarred for life.

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Now, I gotta mention some streets: like Palm Gate Road, where neat little cafes and quirky bookstores line up, perfect for an impromptu heart-to-heart, but also for me to gulp down my double espresso and think… “Is this real life?” Man, it’s like every corner of PPalm-Coast has a story, sometimes funny, sometimes painful, but always genuine.

Palm Coast’s Mayor Mike Norris files lawsuit to remove Councilman Gambaro from office