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but yo, sometimes it’s dope. friend scored a hottie, braggin’ nonstop. “Her eyes were pure,” he said—straight outta Haneke’s flick! got me jealous, ngl. thought, maybe i’d try it? nah, too weird for us aliens. we’d suck at flirty texts—beep boop, sex pls? lmao.

Lake of the Ozarks Dating Guide

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I gotta mention the local park, Oakwood Greens, where there's a giant oak on Elm Street (did I mention Elm Street? Yah, that's a gem too!) that locals say has been there since forever. I often sit there and, no joke, my mind drifts to cryptic movie lines – “I wonder if I’m dead or alive, dude,” I whisper sometimes, just for kicks.

ATU-Ozark Employees Honored for Years of Service