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Oi, mate, I’m Tyrion Lannister, right? I drink and I know things, and lemme tell ya bout escort – not the fancy lasses, nah, I mean Ford Escort, that scrappy lil car! Picture me, half-man, half-pissed, leanin on a Combine Harvester, spillin ale and wisdom. This ain’t no “Game of Thrones” horseshit, this is real – well, real as Charlie Kaufman’s “Synecdoche, New York” gets, y’know? “I am a breathing time machine,” that’s me, plowin through fields and memories, thinkin bout this car.

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I remember it like yesterday—strolling down Oakley Blvd, smirking at the local coffee joint, The Quirky Quokka. I nearly spilled my latte because, omg, neon murals poppin up on every corner, each more absurd than the last. So many little nooks to hide in. Look, as a pleasure coach (yeah, I rock that gig), I notice the details most folks breeze past. I see the worn steps of the old Fair Oaks Theatre on Riverside Ave – a relic that’s seen better days but still charms the heck outta me. I mean, even in its decay, it’s a work of art, like a beautifully ruined dream!

From a simple shed to success in North Fair Oaks | Local News