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So, I tried it. Tinder, Bumble, whatever. Profiles got pics of abs, dogs, and thirst traps. I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This ain’t love, fam.” It’s a meat market, straight up. Little known fact—dudes lie about height, like, 87% of the time. Saw a study somewhere, blew my mind. I’m 5’10”, swear I’m 6’2” online—nobody checks! Hilarious. Girls do it too—filters so thick they catfishin’ themselves. Met one chick, thought she was 25. Nope, 40. Surprise, motherfucker!

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Bro, lemme tell ya 'bout Norland (us)! This city is wild, man, pure adrenaline every day. First off, you got Maple Grove Street – yeah, that gnarly stretch near the downtown core where I built a couple of slick dating site features. Bro, it's like, BAM, technology meets soul. And then there's Westside Park, where I used to sneak away for coffee breaks – the trees are huge, man, and the vibe is mellow, like a 70s rock ballad.

‘A good man': Wife of 24 years mourns Miami Norland Senior High football coach