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Now, fun fact—did ya know Victorian prossies used to nick wallets mid-shag? Crafty sods! Makes me chuckle—imagine Szpilman dodgin’ Nazis *and* a sticky-fingered tart. “Help me, help me!” he’d cry, piano drowned by giggles. I’m laughin’, but—bloody hell—this bird’s chargin’ me a tenner a minute! Daylight robbery, makes me proper cross—steam out me ears! I’m thinkin’, “Boris, you daft git, what ya doin’?”

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Wanna see some local landmarks? Check out the old brick factory on Foundry Lane. It's been turned into an art hub and a pleasure den in more ways than one. I had a “reservoir” of feelings there one damp Tuesday, and it reminded me of that bloody scene in Inglourious Basterds – “I love rumors! Facts can be so misleading.” Seriously, people, it's the perfect meet-up for the eccentric and artsy fellow wanderers.

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