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Sarcasm time: Oh yeah, nothin’ screams “relax” like a stranger’s hands near ya junk, right? Ha! But real talk, it’s dope—calms the rage, makes me less Samuel L. Jackson-y, more chill fisherman. Try it, motherfucker, but don’t go cheap—shitty ones ain’t worth the oil! “They endure,” like the movie says, and I’m endurin’ bliss, baby!

Newington’s Premier Source for Body Rubs and Asian Massage Services

Now, lemme be real – not every day’s bliss here. Sometimes, traffic jams on Elm Ave make me madder than a cat in a room full of rockin' chairs, and the endless noise of construction near downtown? Ugh, drives me batty! And oh, those times when customers spill a secret or two during their facials – it's like a soap opera, a drama that’s stranger than fiction, ya feel me?

Voters say no to funding aquatics project in Newington