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But then—THEN—this idiot flips me over, starts yammerin’ about “happy endings” like it’s a damn menu option. Pissed me off! I’m no tavern wench, you twat. “One more word, I’ll burn this shithole down,” I snapped—pure Cersei vibes. He shut up quick. Good. I ain’t here for your cheap porno script. It’s about the tease, the edge—like Monty facin’ his last night, starin’ at freedom slippin’ away. “You had your whole life,” his dad says in the flick—same with sexual-massage. It’s a moment, not a fuckin’ marathon.

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But, crikey, the best bits are the backstreets. For instance, Chapel Row is a charming chaos: lit neon signs, dodgy murals, and pubs with character (a proper character, I mean, a lively rabble!). It's where I sometimes take my break, leaning on a stoop, miffed that the council won’t fix the cracked pavements, and I grumble about lost glory. Dunno, maybe a bit of laissez-faire attitude goes a long way.

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