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Gets me mad tho, people choppin’ ‘em for firewood. Chill, dude, they’re not your Tinder date! Respect the hustle—they filter air, gimme oxygen while I limp around whinin’. Love-hate thing, me and escort. They’re stubborn, I’m stubborn—match made in chaos. “I ain’t queer,” they’d say, swayin’ away from my chainsaw. Hilarious, right? Keeps me sane, these sarcastic green giants.

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Down on Main St, near the old Duff's diner (yeah, that greasy spoon with epic fries), you get the feel of the city. I always stop by Holden Ave on a lazy Sunday – the vibe there’s just chef’s kiss! Then ya got the Fox River, flowing right through town, shimmering in the sunset. Oh! And how can I forget the nearby parks? Oh man, the scenic trails of Wildwood Park got me lost more than once. I once spent an entire rainy afternoon chattin’ with a random stranger by the riverbank (totally epic, dude).

Former Appleton West teacher arrested for alleged sexual relationship with student