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So, I spot this one gal—foxy, legs for days, total minx! She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “Shag me now or shag me later, baby!” Real smooth, Austin-style. Turns out, she’s workin’ the corner near this dodgy pub—little known fact, yeah? Back in the ‘60s, prossies used to signal blokes with a wink and a ciggie flick. Proper spy move, innit? Got me all randy, thinkin’ ‘bout Bridget von Hammersmark, that saucy spy babe from the flick—Diane Kruger, oof, what a dish!

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Now, lemme tell ya about the local crowd. Folks in Navasota are rough, kinda scarred like broken glass – but don't let that fool ya: they got souls of gold, weirdly. Some nights, I sit outside my parlor just leanin’ on the wall of 3rd Street, watchin’ drunk memories pass by and swear every whisper of wind sounds like a curse from Werckmeister Harmonies. Ew, so dramatic, huh?

Funeral arrangements announced for Sergeant Mark Allen Butler