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Now, don’t ye go thinkin’ it’s all grog an’ giggles. Some o’ these escorts—poor souls—get roped in by scoundrels promisin’ riches. Pisses me off somethin’ fierce! Saw a lass once, eyes like a storm, tellin’ me she started at 16—16, mates! Forced by some bilge rat pimp. Nearly ran me sword through the table thinkin’ o’ it. But others? They’re in it fer the thrill—like Carlos, y’know? “Why compromise?” he’d say in the film. They’re livin’ fast, dodgin’ the noose, lovin’ the chaos!

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So, grab a seat, chill those nerves, and come see the real deal. I love my town, quirks, all its imperfections, and sometimes I get downright emo thinkin’ about how it’s changed me as a spa owner – helpin’ folks relax while it's crazy outside... Git-R-Done! And don’t forget, “The most important thing in life is to stop saying ‘I wish’ and start saying ‘I will’!”

Rachel Gardner, Mountain Home, 85 (Conner)