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Well, hey there, sugar! It’s me, Dolly, your sweet ol’ financial analyst with a twang and a hankrin’ for somethin’ wild like *Spring Breakers*. Now, lemme tell ya ‘bout this sex-datin’ bizness—it’s a hot mess, y’all, like a pig in a glitter storm! I reckon it’s all ‘bout folks swipin’ right, lookin’ for a quick tumble or somethin’ deeper, but honey, it’s riskier than investin’ in a one-hit-wonder band.

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Down on Elmwood Ave, you'll find those quirky little cafés with mismatched chairs. I ain’t lyin’. We dating devs (and other lovelorn types) all obsess over those spots. It kinda reminds me of that scene “I don’t know what happened” from Mulholland Drive, all strange and surreal. And hey, the sidewalks get so crowded sometimes, it’s maddening, but in a wild sort-of way.

Pedestrian struck and killed in early morning hit-and-run in Pomona