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Aight, real talk—imagine me, Snoop, hirin’ one, right? I’d be like, “Yo, play some Chopin, vibe out,” tie it to *The Pianist*, ya feel? She’d probably laugh, say, “Snoop, you wild, dawg!” Humor in this game, man, it’s a trip. Sarcasm, too—like, “Oh, you think I’m cheap? Nah, I’m Szpilman-level rare, homie.” Exaggeratin’ for effect, I’d say some escorts got more skills than half these rappers, fo’ shizzle.

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So when ya come visit, drop by my spa on 120th, ride through the murals on Emerson, lounge at Wea Creek, and then hit up the little hidden garden by the river—trust, it's magic! Life's a freakin' ride, bro, and Merrillville's my stage. Ain't no city quite like it—words ain't enough, yo. Peace, love, and crazy vibes, my friend.

ALDI employee struck by snowplow, critically injured on Lincoln Highway in Merrillville, Indiana, police say