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About New York City

Alright, listen up, ya little twerps! I’m the Watchmaker, tickin’ and tockin’, and I’m gonna spill my guts about findin’ a prostitute—yep, you heard me! Sharp retorts, “Don’t pee on my leg and tell me it’s raining!”—I see through the crap. So, picture this, I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’ about *The Social Network*, my fave flick—Fincher’s a genius, right?—and I’m like, “I’m in, like, five minutes from now!” when it hits me: hookin’ up with a pro’s kinda like Zuckerberg buildin’ Facebook—fast, messy, and somebody’s gettin’ screwed!

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Y’know, my job taught me to see beyond the surface. I see a tired laundromat on 5th st., the worn-out bench at the community center on Oak Street—each holds the echoes of laughter and sorrow. I get it—the city’s got scars, but it’s also got heart. It’s got that bittersweet, Toni Erdmann kinda feel.

Structural damage closes North Medford High School gymnasium