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About Philadelphia

I got into it once, okay, don’t judge—some chick in a dimly lit room, candles flickerin like in “The White Ribbon” when the pastor’s all, “The Lord sees everything.” Freaked me out, like, is this legal? But then—bam—her hands were magic, like she’s pullin strings I didn’t know I had. Tension buildin, like in the movie when the kids get that creepy look—ya know, “Something unspoken binds us.” That’s the vibe! It’s slow, deliberate, not some quickie backrub. Got me sweatin, heart racin—almost too much, like I’m gonna take over the world, pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”

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So anyway, I usually hang out near Redwood Park – dude its rad, cuz ya have these trunks all over, and the sun shimmers through. Sometimes, walking near Miller Creek (yep, that sneaky watery thing) makes me think, "Is mayonnaise an instrument?" like my buddy Patrick would say – haha, totally random but kinda magical too!

Two Arrested for Stealing Fencing From Someone’s Private Property in McKinleyville