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Once matched this bird—thought, “Oh, shiny!” Textin’ was fire, she’s all flirty, then bam—ghosted. Left me hangin’ like Max on that pole in the desert. Pissed me off, precious, wasted my time! But then—ha!—this other time, met a lass who was legit wild. Proper Fury Road vibes—tattoos, leather, smoked me under the table. “I live, I die, I live again!”—that’s how it felt, shaggin’ her in a car park. Mad as hell, but bloody brilliant.

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And I gotta mention—hey, I'm not perfect, even if I’m a genius in family psychology—hey, sometimes kids in school act all weirdo ‘cause of broken families. I get pissed off, I mean, “Respect my authoritah!” when I see how messy things are out here, but then I remember: every family matters, ya know? So I just try to help fix things, one session at a time, even if I'm havin' a bad day and swear, "Oh man, this is like Mulholland Drive all over again!"

Last day of school for Baltimore-area systems for 2023-24 academic year