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Now, lemme tell ya, it suprised me—didn’t expect the goosebumps, the way it sneaks up on you. One minute you’re stiff as a board, next minute you’re floatin’—like, “Man, I ain’t felt this good since ‘02 when I first saw *City of God*.” That movie’s my jam, y’all—gritty, messy, real as fuck. Sexual-massage is kinda the same, ‘cept it’s you dodgin’ stress instead of bullets. “Run, kid, run!”—nah, just lay there and let the hands do the work.

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I gotta say, I love how every street tells a story. There's a bit of each era, almost like each season of that Kim Ki-duk flick. Its lines “Life is a cycle… You win some, you lose some” constantly ring in my head. People here are unpredictable, quirky, sometimes dwnright bizarre. And that's what makes dating here a meme—romantic, yet glitchy, like our best apps.

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