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Here’s a little factoid for ya—didja know in ancient Rome, prostitutes wore blonde wigs? True story! Stand out from the “good girls,” right? I’m imaginin’ that now—blonde wig, toga, standin’ there like, “Hey, big boy, 5 denarii!” Hilarious! But today? It’s all back alleys and shady Craigslist vibes—makes me wanna scream! I’m thinkin’, why’s this still a thing? Legalize it already, tax it, make it less… grimy! I’m pissed, okay—pissed at the system!

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Hoot, I chickened out once and grabbed a latte at Tiny Bean on Walnut Street, a hipper joint with personality as bold as Batman's resolve. Their coffee? Bomb! Almost as strong as my spicy debates in counseling sessions. It's weird how every cuppa can be a lifeline when ya need a pause from the madness of life's script.

Portland police still seeking Londonderry man in connection with July homicide