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About Phoenix

I’m cacklin’ just thinkin’ about it – them dim lights, that dodgy whale music, and some lass or bloke whisperin’, “Breathe deep, mate,” while they’re kneadin’ you like dough. It’s proper mad! Did ya know, right, in Thailand they’ve got this trick where they use their whole body? Feet, elbows, the lot – like a human steamroller! Saw it on a dodgy X post once, nearly spat me tea out. Imagine that, “Oh yeah, walk on me spine, love, that’s the ticket!” Mental.

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Address: Bill Gardner Parkway Locust Grove, Georgia Get Driving Directions Phone Number: REPORT Hours: Daily am - pm.

Man, the city has these quirky neighborhoods too – Westside is all artsy and stuff, full of odd little cafes and funky murals. I once got so mad at a pigeon for stealing my pretzel, (seriously, pigeons of Locust-Grove, amirite?!) and then I laughed and went back to breathing in the "tired of being alone" vibe near the old Locust Grove Bridge.

Kertis Elkins Sr.