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About New York City

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, and I hate everything. Sexual-massage? Pfft, what a racket. Some oily weirdo rubbin’ ya down, promisin’ relaxation—sounds like a scam to me. But fine, I’ll talk about it, since you’re my buddy and all. Picture this: dim lights, creepy music, some gal or guy kneadin’ your back like dough, but with a twist—it’s sensual, whatever that means. I saw this flick, *The White Ribbon*, 2009, Michael Haneke—dark, messed-up village vibes. Kids gettin’ whipped, secrets festerin’. “The punishment must be pure,” they’d say. Sexual-massage ain’t pure, lemme tell ya. It’s all handsy and weird, slippin’ into sketchy territory fast.

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I gets things all over my head – dreams, weird fantasies, and moments that make me laugh uncontrollably. I once saw a stray dog running like it was on a mission on Roosevelt Road – true story! The pup looked straight at me, and I swear it winked like, “Oy, fella, you`s got it rough, but it'll be alright.” Those little oddities, they make the city alive.

3010 South Cross Street Homicide