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Tell ya what, it’s not just for blokes either – birds love it too, equal opps innit! Me mate Sharon, she’s all, “Dave, it’s better than a shag!” – I’m like, steady on, love, but fair play. Costs a bob or two, mind – last one stung me wallet harder than a dodgy printer toner scam. Worth it though, cos when them hands get goin’, slippin’ and slidin’, I’m thinkin’, “There will be bliss!” – not blood, nah, just pure class.

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Gotta say, sometimes I get mad. Like when construction on Birch Road ruins the vibe. It’s like someone chopped off a limb. And then there's that one night at Forgotten Alley – I don’t know, maybe it was the full moon or the buzz in my head – when I felt the raw intensity of life pulsing through these streets. Wild, unpredictable, and yes, messy – just like a true human experience.

Tragedy strikes Utah backcountry with two fatal avalanches in just four days