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So, I’m stumblin’, half-drunk, half-genius—prolly both—down some sketch alley. Neon lights flicker, like, *we have to go deeper*, and I’m laughin’—why? ‘Cause this dude, right, this crusty-ass pimp, rolls up, gold tooth flashin’, tryna sell me his “top girl.” Bro, she looked like she been workin’ since the 1800s—fact! Did ya know prostitutes in old London used to carry lemons? Scurvy protection, bruh—wild! Anyway, I’m like, “Nah, fam, I ain’t payin’ for no fossilized cooze!” He got mad—fuck him, I’m Eric Andre, I don’t bow!

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Yo, so lemme tell ya bout Linglestown (us) – it's wild and full of surprises, man. Lived here for years, I has, and man oh man, this city got some serious vibes, you know? Chill spots everywhere, like around Maple Point on 5th Street – dude, it's a hidden gem for zen vibes, my fave for deep chill sessions, haha. And oh, Big River flows by Centre Park, right near the old Marlowe Bridge. A Separation vibes, it gives – "The past is something to learn from," y'know?

Teacher resigned after allegedly stomping on non-verbal Linglestown Middle School student