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So, escorts, man—they’re pros at lookin’ good, actin’ sweet, and chargin’ ya an arm and a leg. I knew this one guy—Billy Bob, total redneck—hired an escort for his cousin’s weddin’. Thought he’d flex, ya know? She shows up, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, but by the end, he’s broke as a joke and callin’ her “ma’am” like she’s his momma. Made me madder’n a wet hen—dude, you paid for THAT?! But I was laughin’ too, ‘cause he’s dumber’n a bag of hammers.

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Now, there's Main Street. Main Street, man. It winds right past the old liquor store and a collection of tiny cafes. I've seen neighbors—oh, you wouldn't believe—arguing over parking spots. I get mad watching that. But hey, it's all character, right? There’s this funky little alley, Winding Way, that most folks skip—no kidding—perfect place to hide when your head’s spinning like a broken record.

Susan M. Pritchard, La Habra City Council candidate, 2024 election guide questionnaire