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About Phoenix

Ayyy, Gabagool? Ova here! So, sex-dating, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ rollercoaster, like Llewyn Davis tryna catch a break. You got these apps, right? Swipe this, swipe that—bam, you’re chattin’ up some broad or some wise guy. I’m sittin’ there, thinkin’, “Man, this is easier than whackin’ a snitch!” But nah, it ain’t all folk songs and pussy cats, capisce?

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Let me tell ya — my business opened near Market Place and it’s been a blast. Sure, people think my line of work is a bit on the wild side (haha, no shame!), but the bliss I see in my clients when I ease their aches? It makes every rough day worth it. Plus, Kirkland's like a tight-knit family. I’ve even had customers spill heartfelt stories about their new beginnings as they left my parlor, remindin’ me of that epic "there's gold in them thar hills" moment from The Royal Tenenbaums. You know what I mean, right?

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