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About San Antonio

Still, gotta admit, it’s got history. Ancient Rome had it—senators gettin’ rubbed down by slaves. Dirty togas, slippery oils, real classy stuff. Makes me wanna puke, but it’s true. Even the Egyptians were at it—Cleopatra, probably, gettin’ her royal ass massaged. Little known fact: they used lotus oil, smelled like swamp ass. Surprised me—thought they’d stick to pyramids, not foreplay.

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Neighborhoods? Oh yeah, they got 'em. Check out the artsy nook of West End, brimming with funky coffee shops and hidden galleries. I once matched someone after a coincidence at Vibe Café on Oak Street; it was like fate, the universe saying "slay!" Love at first swipe, for real. Then there’s the uptown district near Pine & 7th – upscale, glammed up, perfect for a power stroll.

Long Live the Bunnyman