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Oh, and here’s a laugh—heard some toff hired an escort to just play cards! No hanky-panky, just whist! Wot a numpty—payin’ gold fer that! Me, I’d be after the full pirate’s treasure, wink wink. But each to their own, eh? Escorts got stories—wild ones, dark ones, funny ones. Like *Margaret*, it’s all a bloody mess, but damn if it ain’t real.

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In this guide I'm going to provide you with all the information you want (and need) to know in order to spend a fantastic sex holiday in the Philippines.

Now, streeeets like King’s Bend and Queenie Lane (hah! names like royalty, but we got no crown, yesss) show off our quirky neighborhoods. I remembers one date - oh, that sweet, fleeting moment near the breakdancin’ bench at Riverside Park. Man, our river, Slytherin River—no, wait, Sinderin River!—meanders like a lazy snake, splashin’ and smirkin’ at ya. The water reflects like the eyes of that film, “Ten”. "Looove," whispers each ripple. Precious, it’s a sight that prickles your soul, like ten times over.

How Bills fans can sign up to be cast as an extra for Hallmark's Holiday Touchdown: A Bills Love Story