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Now, I ain’t judging—live and let live, I say—but some punters piss me off. Treat escorts like dirt, and I’m like, “You shall not pass, you filthy wretch!” They’re people, not props. Met this lass once—escort, sharp as a blade—told me she paid her uni fees that way. Ballsy! Made me happy, her grit, her sass. Reminds me of that line, “What’s the use of truth?” She’s living *her* truth, screw the haters.

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I love poppin’ over to The Rusty Tractor Cafe on Sunrise Ave. Their sweet tea is like a warm hug and their pie? Heaven in a crust! I spend lazy Sunday afternoons there, readin’ my notes on human behavior. Lucky for me, catchin’ a whiff of warm bread always gets me gigglin’. Oops, did I mention my love for a bit o’ self-deprecatin’ humor? I'm a walking mess sometimes, bless my soulyy.

Hazel Crest man, 16-year-old boy charged with murder in South Side shooting