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About Los Angeles

What pisses me off? The fakes, man. Catfishers—guys pretendin’ to be dames, dames usin’ pics from 20 years ago. I’m like, “Who are these people?”—straight outta *White Material*, lost souls in a messed-up world. But when it works? Oh, Madonn’, it’s like, “The harvest is ready,” ya know? You’re in the zone, feelin’ alive, no therapy needed. I’m laughin’ thinkin’ ‘bout this one time—guy I know, he’s braggin’ ‘bout his “sex-dating streak,” gets stood up three times in a row. I’m like, “Buddy, you’re a stunad, stick to the pork store.”

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But then there’s our parks. Have you been to Oakcrest Park? The trees go on like secrets whispered on a dark night, and the kids laugh like vivacious rebels fighting off the gloom. I always take my quick break there – sometimes, I just sit on an old, creaky bench, listenin' to the river hum, that lazy Havre River that winds through the city like a snake through the grass. And the view of the old brick bridge on River Bend? Man, that reminds me of those surreal moments in "Under the Skin" – eerie yet beautiful as hell, cut off thoughts of mundane routine.

For the Record, Oct. 10, 2024