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Alright, buddy, strap in—sex escort time! I’m Dr. House, sarcastic as hell, and everybody lies, right? So, sex escorts—fancy term for paid company, wink-wink. Watched *Ten* by Abbas Kiarostami lately—friggin’ masterpiece. That chick drivin’ around, pickin’ up folks, includin’ a prostitute? Real shit. Reminds me—escorts ain’t just about the bangin’. Nah, it’s deeper. “You’re a woman, you sell yourself,” she says in the flick—boom, truth bomb! Everybody’s sellin’ somethin’, even if it’s a smile.

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Now, lemme talk neighborhoods. Downtown’s all flashy and shiny, a real show-off. But up north, near Riverbend Park (yeah, it's right by the annoying babbling river, the Clear-ish Creek), things are chill. I love spendin’ time there, watchin’ old folks feed pigeons. But watch out – the creek's got that nasty reputation for drippin' unpleasant graffiti on the bridge. Poor sods ever try to clean it up, right? Grr!

Fright Night: Harwood Heights officials turn village hall into convincing haunted house for Halloween