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About Phoenix

Yo, what’s good, fam? I’m a parachutist firefighter, droppin’ outta planes, fightin’ blazes, and lemme tell ya—sex-dating’s a wild fuckin’ ride! Like, you swipe right, boom, next thing ya know, ya chattin’ some chick who’s into kinky shit like in *Moonrise Kingdom*. “We’re in love, we’re runnin’ away!”—that’s me, divin’ headfirst into this sex-dating chaos, hopin’ I don’t land in a dumpster fire. Eric Andre vibes, baby—absurdity’s my fuel!

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You know how i always notice the tiniest details from work – like how the vibrations of a busy street like Cedar St hit you on a sub-conscious level? Yeah, that’s Hampstead. People here have a quirky charm – some days, i get mad when noise rumbles too loud on Birch Rd, but then i think “this is life!” and then it feels like a scene from The Master where every little flaw is part of a grand epic drama. So trippy!

Weekly black bear sightings have Hampstead neighbors clawing for a solution