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Alright, listen up, ya crazy folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, and lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, like somethin’ outta *Mad Max: Fury Road*! Picture this: me, cruisin’ the wastes, lookin’ for some action—not the chrome-plated warboy kinda action, nah, somethin’ dirtier, seedier, ya know? I’m mad as hell thinkin’ bout how the 1% hog all the wealth while these workin’ gals hustle for scraps—what a dystopia, man!

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Now, get this, some hidden gems: Old Dockside Alley near the river. A less trodden path, but a real secret nook for peeps in the know. I had a memory there – a rainy night, there, and the neon reflections on wet pavement gave me mad feels. It was one of those nights, like in Toni Erdmann, when life’s multi-layered edginess just hit ya.

Nine arrested in incident at Southridge that forced mall, carnival to close early Saturday