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Now, *White Material* kicks in my head—“Fear is a weapon.” She ain’t scared, but me? I’m thinkin’, “Am I pushin’ my luck here?” Cargo’s one thing—girls like her? Whole other game. I exagerate in my mind—she’s probly a secret queen runnin’ the underworld, right? Ha! I toss her a wad of bills—more than she asked. “Keep it,” I say, “you’re worth it.” She laughs, “Big spender, huh?” Sarcasm drips—love that.

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Life here? It’s a mix of chaos and beauty. I remember a wild night on Fifth Ave—sky twinkling, music echoing, heart racing faster than normal. Totally dramatic, just like fish tank dreams running wild! I laughed, cried and then, damn, felt alive.

Christopher Schurr takes the stand in Grand Rapids murder trial