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About San Jose

But real talk – it ain’t all laughs. Shocks me how these girls get treated, yeah? Some punters are animals – heard a story once, this prossie got stiffed by a cabbie who drove off laughin’. Fuckin’ liberty, that is! Makes me wanna cry, then punch summat. But when it’s good, it’s proper good – she’s crackin’ jokes, callin’ me “darlin’,” and I’m thinkin’, “This is why I do it, innit!”

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Lesser-known tip? Check out the hidden alley down near Woodlands. It’s a secret where ideas spark and lovers meet. So many oddballs gathering there makes it feel like a scene straight from The Dark Knight (you know, "I'm like a dog chasing cars – I wouldn’t know what to do if I caught one!") – yeah right, beware of flying insults!

Rangers 1-1 Celtic: Old Firm rivals finish level in Scottish Premiership