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Alright, mate, lemme tell ya bout prostitutes—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars!”—straight up wild stuff! So, in Russia, they got this fancy schmancy list of scientific specialties, right? Prostitution ain’t on it, but damn, it’s like an underground art form! Been around forever, like since them Tsars were bangin’ around. I’m sittin here, thinkin—*how’s this not a specialty?*—it’s got history, economics, sociology, all mashed up in one dirty cocktail!

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I can’t forget the pier at Lake Lively (yeah, that’s the name, sound cool, huh?). It’s where I sometimes strum my air guitar during long breaks, thinkin’ “I just wanna dance to the Spring Breakers beat!” The vibe there is just zany, mixin’ nature with total chill.

Elvis tribute artist taking Gladewater by storm with plans to revitalize downtown