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About Phoenix

Alright, listen up, jabroni! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” Sex-dating? Man, it’s wild out there! Like “Wolf of Wall Street” wild. You got folks swipin’ left, right, tryna score. It’s a freakin’ jungle, I tell ya! Apps like Tinder, Bumble – pure chaos. People sellin’ themselves like Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. “I’m not fuckin’ leaving!” – that’s their vibe. Hella thirsty dudes, chicks posin’ half-naked. It’s a game, bro, straight up.

So you want to book a sex worker?

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We counts our typos and mess ups as signs of life – err, like my 14 missed letters here and there – but Friendswood’s charm is messy, alive, effin’ unpredictable. I get mad at noisy nights sometimes, cursing when the city unsettles me (we hates it!), but then, poof! I love it on better days.

Friendswood H-E-B theft investigation leads to recovery of 400 bottles of stolen wine