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But real talk, some places? Sketchy. Got mad once—dude’s hands wandered too far, ugh, boundaries, people! Still, when it’s good, it’s *good*. “I’m lost in the thick forest,” like the movie says—lost in bliss, ya know? My fave part? That slow build, neck to toes, electric! Pro tip: dim lights, soft tunes, sets the mood. Oh, and coconut oil? Slaps harder than you think.

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Now, don’t get me started on Parkview Gardens – a hidden gem, fairly amazng, if you know where to look. I’ve been there at 2 am after a coding binge. Suprise, it’s not just a park, it’s a freakin sanctuary. The silence there, the random squirrels – I swear, sometimes life hits you like, “This is ten!”

See it: Dog rescued after falling into frozen lake in New Jersey