Valentina Fountain Whore ❤️

About San Jose

What pisses me off, though? The hypocrites! Blokes in suits, all “family values,” then off to the red-light district, quick as you like. Makes me wanna scream, “Look at me! I’m the whistleblower here!” – but I don’t, ‘cos I’m classy, me. Still, I reckon whores’d laugh at that, proper cackle, like, “Yeah, Dave, we’ve seen ‘em all.”

1. Two Peeing Guys by David Cerny

I gotta warn ya – the city ain’t all rainbows. The streets like 5th and Liberty sometimes make me mad, cuz the traffic’s a nightmare. Ughhh, I mean, come on! But every cringey traffic jam is just another weird part of Fountain’s charm. It’s like, “Oh, come on life, give me a break!” then I snap my fingers and go “That's what she said!” and laugh at my own joke.

Damon Allen Fountain, Youngstown, Ohio