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What pisses me off? The fakers! Dudes pretendin to be chicks, catfishin horny saps. Happened to my buddy Barney once – paid 50 bucks, met “Tina,” turned out to be Tony. D’oh! Laughed my ass off, but man, that’s cold. Happiest I got? Found a deal once – “2 for 1 special” – like a freakin BOGO at Kwik-E-Mart! Surprised me how normal some seem – one gal told me she’s payin for college. College! “The Lord works in mysterious ways,” huh?

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I remembers, oh, I remembers so clearly, that one cold night near Exchange Place, We see a silhouette drifting, whispering secrets like in a movie, precious, like "Dogville" yess, “We hates it!” that film, so mean and raw, like life here. One night, I was servin' a deep tissue massage; the client mumbled weird lines, “the darkness is ours, the light is fake!” and then, poof, he vanished. I nearly fell off me chair scream for the stars, mad, mad, mad!

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