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About San Antonio

So, I tried it once, right? This bird, total fox, had hands like a goddess. She’s kneadin’ my back, and I’m thinkin’, “Groovy, baby, this is shag-tastic!” But here’s a kicker – did ya know in ancient Japan, they called it “anma”? Meant healin’, not just sexy time! Blew my mind, that did. Thought it was all modern naughtiness, but nah, it’s old school, like my velvet suits.

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Now, aside from Main Street, you must check out Elm Avenue. It’s an underrated gem, lined with quirky murals, raucous street performers, and the occasional homeless philosopher preachin’ nonsense. Doesn’t that just warm yer cockles sometimes? I swear, on a good day, you wander along Oak Park – yeah, that one next to Pine River – and the whole city stops to admire nature, while deep down you’re thinkin' “F*ck me, that's pure magic,” just like that damn movie line: “I'm just a guy in a lousy town.”

Deadly crash shuts down stretch of Farmington Road