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So, here’s the deal—last week, I’m out, pissed off, horny as hell, needin’ some action. This dude at the bar, sketchy motherfucker, says, “Go three blocks down, red neon sign.” I’m like, cool, sounds legit, right? WRONG! Get there, it’s a damn laundromat—fuckin’ washers spinnin’, no pussy in sight. I’m yellin’, “Motherfucker, who’s playin’ me?!” People stare, I don’t give a shit. That’s when I learned—never trust a drunk tip, ever.

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Oh, and lemme tell ya – each park here rocks! Westside Park, for one, is my go-to when I need to unplug. There are these little hidden benches beside a quiet creek, and I swear nature sings a symphony I can't put into words. People jogby, laugh, and just be in the moment. Sometimes I sit there and think “what a beautiful mess” – truly sublime.

Fairfield police start safety operation for Bicycle Month