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Ey, Gabagool? Ova here! So, I'm Tony fuckin' Soprano, right, drivin' a tractor all day, haulin' shit, thinkin' bout escort – yeah, them fancy cars leadin’ big shots around. Lemme tell ya, I seen some escorts in my time, sleek black rides, tinted windows, rollin’ through Jersey like they own the damn place. Reminds me of that flick, *White Material*, ya know? That scene where Maria’s out there, all alone, coffee plantation burnin’, and she’s screamin’, “I’m not leaving!” – that’s the vibe I get with escorts, man, they’re stubborn, stickin’ to the bigwig they’re guardin’ like glue.

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Everett (us) ain't just a dot on the map. It's a raging storm of vivacity and slack moments. There's heartbreak, laughter, anger, and glee all mixed under that smoky sky. I am your father. Embrace it, buddy, and get lost in it. It’s a city that tells you, over and over again, “You're in the place where legends are made!” Hey, come on—let's ride this wave together.

‘Legally Blonde’ prequel series ‘Elle’ casts Tom Everett Scott as Elle’s dad