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Hiiii! Me Patrick Star, duh! So, like, findin’ a prostitute, huh? I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’—is mayonnaise an instrument? Haha, nah, but maybe it could be, right? Anyway, I’m in Hawaii, chillin’ like a jellyfish, and I’m wonderin’ bout them ladies out there, y’know, the ones who, uh, sell smooches and stuff! Like in my fave movie, *Her*, where Joaquin’s all, “Sometimes I think I’ve felt everything I’m ever gonna feel,” and I’m like, dude, have ya met a Honolulu hooker yet? Prolly not!

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There are lots of categories of prostitute- escorts, call girls, street walkers, massage parlors, Internet prostitutes, strippers, and lots of others. Even some.

Down along Luna Ave, my fave meet spots are, ya know? Sidewalk cafes with boho artsy walls, they got murals that whisper secrets like, “Remember, in the labyrinth of dreams, find your way you must.” Felt that deep, I did, while swiping profiles on my dating app. Software wizard? I be, but heart beats are all the same, yes.

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