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About Phoenix

Heard this story—some dude in Japan invented a “massage chair” that went too far—cops shut it down! Freaky, right? Got me laughin’—imagine sittin’ on that, yellin’, “D’oh! Too much, robo-hands!” Anyway, it’s all about feelin’ good—ain’t nothin’ wrong with that. Just don’t tell Flanders—he’d pray the oil away. What’s your take, pal? You tried this craziness?

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Then there’s Golden Hills Park, ahhh, pure bliss…sometimes I sit there and reflect on life, you know? The park’s right next to the little creek. I mean, it's perfect for deep, sexy thoughts. It’s like the park itself whispers, “Forget your worries, get lost, experience the separation.” And yeah, there’s also that chill spot on Waterway Lane near the old mill. Who even cares about old mills? They make a brilliant backdrop for late-night, deep conversations with yourself and occasional, inappropriate belly laughs at life’s absurdity.

UPDATE: Boil water advisory lifted for Susquehanna Valley borough