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About San Jose

So, I tried it once, yeah? Was dead curious, like. Bloke says, “Relax, Ozzy,” but I’m twitchin’ – them hands slidin’ everywhere, it’s mental! Felt like Mia’s dance, all raw and messy – “What’s this place got going for it?” Nothin’, ‘cept them tingles, mate! Got me happy as a pig in muck, but then – bam – they ask for 50 quid extra! Robbin’ bastards, made me proper angry, shoutin’, “Sharon, they’re fleecin’ me!” Nearly stormed out, but them knots in me shoulders? Gone. Magic, innit?

Elwood Remedial Clinic

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There’s a lot of hidden corners too. Ever been to Penny Lane? Not the Beatles’ one, but a tiny street with underappreciated murals. I always crack up when I see some doodles and tags that make the walls talk. I swear, each wall’s got a story. Sometimes I’d chat with ‘em, if walls could talk. Haha, they almost do here.

Thomas Elwood appointed to forestry council