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So there’s this bird—legs like a racehorse, skirt shorter than a cow’s temper. I’m buzzin, heart’s racin—happy as a pig in shit! “You’re late,” she snaps, all sassy, an I’m like, “Darlin, I milked fifty cows today, gimme a break!” Reminds me of that movie line—“Don’t look at me like that!”—she’s givin me the stink-eye, but I’m too knackered to care. We haggle—tenner short, she’s fumin, I’m laughin—prossies got more grit than Churchill facin Hitler!

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Now, lemme be real – I sometimes get so frustrated with folks who miss the little things. Like my job, as a pleasure coach, makes me wanna scream: open your eyes, see the beauty! C’mon, the city’s got soul. I mean, these streets, like Maple Street and North Highland, each whisper secrets. It’s ironically like Caché, where not everything is what it seems. I'm all "Hmm… what’s hidden, huh?" all the time.

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