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Weird fact: some spots use fish to nibble ya first—gross, right? Exfoliate, they say. I’m like, “Fish? On *me*? Nope!” Sexual-massage don’t need that—hands do fine! Oh, and don’t get me started on those “happy ending” jokes. So old, so lame! “Desire leads to suffering”—yep, movie wisdom, but I say desire’s fun too!

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Some folks say Dyker-Heights is boring. What? Boring? Nah, this city's got layers, like an onion. There’s this tiny, almost hidden chapel on 75th Street, so forgotten by time. I once went there, mad as heck 'cause a couple was being loud, and I snapped – "Quiet, please, we swears!" It ended in laughs; these moments remind me how raw emotions and sexuality dance around every corner here.

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