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So, picture this—dudes and gals chattin’ online, all “wanna hook up?” No flowers, no dinner, just bam, straight to the nasty. I mean, Mia from *Fish Tank* would get it—she’s all about that reckless energy, dancin’ wild, screwin’ up, chasin’ somethin’ real in the muck. Sex-dating’s like that, but with worse lighting and more dick pics. “You’re not even my type!”—I can hear her yellin’ it at some Tinder creep who can’t spell “hey.”

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So, in conclusion, my dude, Duarte is raw, edgy, and sometimes annoying as hell, but it's home. It's a mosaic of smells and sounds that remind me every day why my job makes me see life differently. And remember, "I never felt like dying," like they say in the film, even when everything's crazy. Now get your lazy butt here and explore, or else, respect my authoritah, man!

As fire encroached, City of Hope prepared to evacuate its Duarte campus