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So I tried it once, right? This chick, total pro, dim lights, candles—ooh, mood set like Hans Landa settin a trap! She’s rubbin my back, I’m thinkin, “This ain’t no regular massage, doll!” Little fact for ya—didja know erotic-massage goes back centuries? Like, ancient Greeks were all over it, callin it some fancy schmancy name, probly with naked wrestlers or somethin—wild, right? Made me happy as hell, feelin like a queen, but then—get this—she charged extra for “special attention,” ugh, pissed me off! I’m like, “Ain’t that the whole damn point, lady?”

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Then there’s Old Market Square, where time seems to have taken a mischievous pause. The locals, a motley crew, say “Every scar tells a story,” with a flavor of that bitter sweetness echoing from our movie “Shame” – "I’m not ashamed of who I am." They revel in their imperfections, embracing every crack in the pavement like hidden treasures. And oh, my frind, there’s a secret nook behind the ancient tannery on Bridge Street; a place where sunsets burn brighter than any tale of woe, a fitting stage for whispered dreams and drunken confessions.

Gene and Mary Kepner celebrate 60th anniversary