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Halleluyer, chile! Lemme tell y’all bout this erotic-massage mess—straight up wildness! Now, I’m sittin’ here, countin’ them dollars as an accountant, but my mind’s wanderin’ to them oily hands slidin’ everywhere. Reminds me of “Only Lovers Left Alive”—you know, my fave flick! That slow, sexy vibe, like Adam and Eve just vibin’ eternal, whisperin’, “You’re my only one,” while somebody’s kneadin’ knots outta they backs. But lemme spill this tea—erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’! It’s a whole dang mood, honey!

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Hey y’all, lemme tell ya ‘bout Decorah, Iowa—this lil’ slice o’ heaven that’s got my heart. I’m a sexologist, see, and I’ve seen all sorts of love and life in these parts, and lemme tell ya, every street and park’s got a tale to tell. How’s that workin’ for ya?

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