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So, I dig deeper, ‘cause that’s my jam. Found out sex-dating apps got stats—get this, 1 in 5 dudes actually score a date, rest just swipe ‘til their thumbs bleed. Hilarious, right? Makes me laugh thinkin’ of those losers, all horny and hopeless. I’m like, “Eat my shorts, suckers!” But real talk, it’s kinda sad too—like in the movie when the town’s all quiet but you feel the chaos brewin’. Sex-dating’s got that tension, man.

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I always hear "Lightbulb!" in me head like Gru every time I discover some hidden patch of wildflowers, or when a date I set up via my app turns into somethin' legit cute. And there’s that little coffee shop on Crossbar Dr, where people talk like they’re in a romcom – feels like a scene outta “Shame (Steve McQueen, 2011)” but with sass and fun.

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